Hi everybody! As with anything new there is always a need to start somewhere. No matter what your goal is (losing weight, better job, career, love, money), you have to get really clear first about who you are. When I say that I mean there is really no way to attain anything that you want into your life without first accepting responsibility completely and totally for yourself, all that you have done before this very day. If you can blame anyone at all for any aspect of your life then you will be hard pressed to meet any goal at all....ever. Blaming someone else or an event is essentially giving away the power that you have to change and take charge of your life and in what direction it will go. That is an untruth that you've told yourself and it is high time to knock that the hell off.
You must:
1. Take 100% responsibility of your life, everything you experience, achievements, results, quality of your relationships, health and fitness, income, debts and feelings. That's right! All of THAT.
- YOU ate the junk food.
- YOU didn't say no.
- YOU took that job.
- YOU stayed at the job.
- YOU believed them.
- YOU abandoned your dream.
- YOU bought it.
- YOU didn't take care of it.
- YOU decided to do it alone.
- YOU trusted him/her.
- YOU ignored your gut.
- YOU decided to do something else.
- YOU decided to take care of them and not you.
- YOU decided to watch TV instead.
You have to get real clear and understand that your life, everything in it, around it and thought about it is about you. It always is. Every time. Without fail. Even when you blame someone else or a thing that is still about you. It's your response.
2. STOP looking outside of yourself for results/answers that YOU want. Nothing outside of you is going to EVER give you a result, because ALL results come from within you. Let's also be real honest with ourselves. No one OUT THERE will ever want the things that you want for yourself as much as you. They just won't and they can't. They aren't in your skin or in your head or heart to understand. They have their own agendas. That is not a bad thing to know. Sure, there are people who care about you and want to see you succeed, but ultimately the "want" for something is about you. Once you really get that, you can empower yourself. It's wonderful to have support along the way and you should! But ultimately, all of the answers you need reside in you and so does all actions necessary to do what you want to do. All of it.
3. By acknowledging that you created everything around you and within you, you can then uncreate it and start fresh, meaning the pieces that are not giving the joy and satisfaction that you really daydream about. This is hard for some to do. No one wants to look at their life and actively say "I allowed that", "I did that", "I said that", "I took that course", "I didn't listen to". Nobody, especially when it is a new concept to understand. It goes against our ego to assume responsibility for our actions, thoughts and decisions. It really does! But if it worked? You wouldn't be reading this right now. You wouldn't for a second think "I wonder what this crazy blond broad has to say". There is something in you that wants to do more, be more, and accept more into your life and you haven't been as successful as you would like to be. That's exactly why.
My story: A day or two after my marriage broke up, which feels like eons ago now, I can pinpoint the exact day that some of these principles floated into my head. I didn't really get it yet, but it was the first time that I started to understand on my own. I was sitting on the back step after having just let my dog out to go to the bathroom. For some reason I watched him sniff here, sniff there, walk around in a circle 5 times like he was chasing his tail, decide to stop doing that and then go somewhere else to do the same damn thing when it hit me; "my dog will take more time to find a good spot to poop then I do to make decisions about my life". It was so true too! It took him a good 3 minutes just to find the "right" spot to poop in and here I was sitting on the back porch having just left my marriage, he moved out and the whole process took a second. I never even gave it a thought. I just acted. He was gone. Clothes were gone. Kids were with him right at that minute and I literally had no one to blame for any of it. Nobody. I reacted so quickly out of a place of frustration and resentment like I was deciding to walk to the end of the block and back, but here my dog is really trying to find the exact perfect place to poop. Look, I never said it was going to be perfect. hahahaha The way in which we receive these splinters of understanding of our power don't necessarily come in a bow to the front door with a tag that says "read this. It's going to be witty, insightful and you will be so consumed with love and wonder that you'll write your autobiography about it to millions". Sometimes, it literally comes in the form of....you got it....poop. And you never forget it.
You have control over only three things in your life:
1) The thoughts you think.
2) The images that you visualize.
3) The actions you take.
How you use these three things determines everything you experience. So, I ask you today to sit and think about how and why you are where you are today. Go back over big points in your life that seemed to change how you looked at things and ask yourself "did I change for the better? What did I learn? How am I now better from that experience?" A lot of us get hung up on our lives and the experiences we have had in a way that is negative and limits us, but by actively acknowledging how we have grown from it, what made us better and how we can use that to our advantage you can start to change the process about how we view experiences and our reactions/responses. It offers us a chance to know that life allows us to grow even when we feel completely and totally beat down, and that? That is how we get stronger, empowered and evolve into everything we want and are meant to be. It all starts with you. You are so much more than you could ever know. Isn't it time that you find out who that person is? How great you are and what you have to offer to the world? It is. Make that time now. Take stock of your life and realize your power. It will be the greatest gift you ever give yourself.
Image credit: Crooksandliars.com
Great article, keep it going!
ReplyDeleteThanks!! You so rock my socks. :)
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